+Doubting Thomas. Poor guy...he gets a bum rap. Every single year preachers tackle this gospel with some version of “Thomas shouldn’t be called doubting, he should be called Believing, for once he encountered the Risen Christ he exclaimed: My Lord and My God!” Preachers---I’ve done it too---just dismiss the doubting part and move right into the believing part. But you know what? Lots of times we need to move through doubt in order to reach belief. That’s what happened to Thomas. And Thomas isn’t special—I think we all do it.
Doubt isn’t a uniquely bad thing Thomas did, it’s a common human thing that we all do.
Doubt is a moment in time, a step in a process. It’s a time of bewilderment, of question---doubt arises when things aren’t clear---when all the evidence isn’t in yet or all the evidence hasn’t crystallized in our brains. Doubt happens when all that we know to be—the order of our world---is shattered.
When I worked as a psychotherapist, I served on a disaster response team. Our job was to mobilize in natural and human made disasters, being among the first responders to the scene. One Labor Day evening we were called out to a railroad crossing in a nearby village. A last blast of summer festival had been going on and a group of kids were hanging out by the crossing when an express train came down the track, striking and killing a local high school sophomore. I had the difficult task of informing the girl’s mother of her death. When given the terrible news, the mother calmly looked at me and said, “No that’s impossible, she was at the movies.” In that moment she was denying reality---then it hit her and she fell to the ground, sobbing. For those first few moments, she doubted the message I’d delivered. She doubted that anything this horrible could happen, but soon her brain began to assimilate it and the tragic truth became clear.
It’s not only bad news that can be met with doubt, good news can be equally difficult to fathom.
Whether it’s the people on tv who’ve won the publishers’ clearinghouse, or finding out you’ve gotten the job of your dreams or hearing that the cancer is gone----good news can take some time to sink in.
Doubt buys us time for the horror or the joy to fully engage.
Doubt gives us time to catch up to the reality of our lives.
In these early days of the Easter season, we have some catching up to do. We have an altogether new reality to face. So do the disciples.
In those first few hours, those first few days following the crucifixion, the reality of the disciples’ life wasn’t pretty. The rabbi they loved; they had denied, the rulers they feared; they had defied. It wasn’t a good time to be a disciple…so when they hear from Mary Magdalene that Jesus is alive, do they run out looking for him carried by this thrilling and joyous news?
No, they remain paralyzed by their doubt, immobilized by their fear, stuck in their shame.
Human nature would dictate that the disciples feared Jesus. While thrilled that Jesus was alive, they must have had some trepidation about seeing him again after their desertion and their denial. But, this time, the disciples couldn’t run and hide. Because, even while behind a locked door, who should appear but Jesus—
Uh oh.
But Jesus, instead of “How could you?,” says, “Peace Be With You.” He doesn’t re-hash their failings but commissions them to go out and spread the Good News of Peace to the world.
He accepts their failings and loves them. He rejects their fear and loves them. He loves them. In spite of themselves.
This is radical. It’s shocking.
And it can take some getting used to!
Even though they’d heard it hundreds of times before, even though we hear it, week in and week out, this simple message of love, peace and forgiveness is hard to understand and it can be difficult to accept.
Thomas, along with the other disciples, needed to experience the reality of Jesus’ resurrection before they “got it.” Their doubt wasn’t a lack of faith, it was a lack of comprehension.
Thomas’ doubt bought him time to accept, to understand, to wrap his brain around all that had happened, so that, when he saw Jesus for himself he would, at least on some level, “get it.” Thomas’ doubt led his faith to a place of understanding. Thomas, given time, Got It.
On this day, the emotional roller coaster of Holy Week is over, we’ve proclaimed Christ risen, we’ve shouted Alleluia, we’ve rejoiced in the new light of Christ.
Today we sit back, along with Thomas and the other disciples, fully aware of what we’re capable of---killing God in the flesh—and aware of what God is capable of--peace and forgiveness.
This astonishing realization of what we can do and what God always does is shocking and takes some getting used too.
So, this morning we begin clearing doubt from our hearts and minds, and embrace the Truth as given to us through Jesus Christ:
That we must go out into the world seeking and serving Christ in everyone we meet.
To not rest until everyone, everywhere knows the Love that is God.
To not rest until peace isn’t just a goal but a reality.
To not run from fear, but to enter it courageously.
To not deny doubt, but embrace it for what it is and see what’s on the other side.
To forgive ourselves for what we’ve left undone while redoubling our efforts to do more.
To see the Risen One--to touch him, to know him and to call out to him “My Lord! My love! My teacher! My hope! My Savior.”
Alleluia and Amen.
No comments:
Post a Comment