+This is how I remember Beverly Mileham:
Sitting at her table in the food pantry, smiling that fabulous smile of hers, looking at me with a glint in her eye, and saying, “Hi ya, Kid!” I had the honor of being Bev’s parish priest for about 7 years, and since I left Good Shepherd and Ascension in late 2015, I’ve loved the handful of times I’ve seen her…always being greeted with that quintessential “Hi Ya Kid!”
This morning we bid our Mother, Grammy, Tick Tock, Aunt, sister-in law, neighbor, friend, fellow parishioner, good bye. But as Bev very clearly stated in the instructions she left regarding this very service, she does not want sadness, she wants joy and celebration. As the poem in the bulletin states:
“I’d like the memory of me to be a happy one, I’d like to leave an afterglow of smiles when life is done.”
Well Bev, the memory of you is a happy one and you not only have left us with an afterglow of smiles in death, but you did so in life as well.
From the shenanigans of that young farm girl on the ridge up in Wilson, to the delight she took as a mother and most especially these last years, as a grandmother, Bev brought smiles to all those whom she encountered.
I’ll never forget whenever she spoke to me about her marriage to Tom—she always had a wistful smile about her and the reminiscence usually ended with, “I miss him so.” Or when she would be bragging on one of the grandkids and she’d say, they’re such great kids,” Bev’s own memories brought her joy.
My goodness, she was a hard worker. Since us Niagara County gals need to stick together, I’d like to say that Bev’s work ethic and zest for life was instilled in her up on the farm—Mary recalls endless stories about what that life was like. As Paul told me the other day, she was proud of being a farm girl.
And something I didn’t know until speaking with the Mary and Tom the other day, Bev, was quite the musician, playing in a Bell Choir and singing in another choir that performed all over…a stroke took away Bev’s ability to sing in that way…but when she could, it brought her great joy. But—and this, I think, is the key to who Bev was---after she could no longer do it there wasn’t a hint of bitterness about her. In fact, and I think the choir members here at Good Shepherd would attest to this, she loved to listen to them sing. It brought her joy.
Do you notice theme here? Things brought her joy---her 44-year marriage to Tom, her children, her grandkids, her friends from long ago on the farm, to the friends she made in the antique and estate sale business, to the friends she made singing in choirs and volunteering in a variety of ways including her work right here in the GS Food Pantry, Bev experienced and most importantly shared her joy, her delight.
Let me set a scene for you:
You’re a person down on your luck, you’ve been out of work for months, you’ve exhausted your savings, the generosity of your friends, family and the side jobs you’ve been picking up don’t bring in enough money. You can’t feed your kids. So, you screw up your courage and find your way to the food pantry. As you walk in the first stop you need to make is at a table “personed” by Joan and Bev. At that moment your whole experience could turn into a nightmare of shame and despondency or an experience of respect, dignity and joy. I saw how Bev interacted with the folks at the Food Pantry---and you know that greeting I shared with you earlier—that “Hi Ya kid” that always made my heart sing? She greeted every single person who walked through the doors of the Good Shepherd Food Pantry with the same affection. Every single time. Folks that isn’t just nice, it’s exactly what our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ expects of us, taught us and showed us.
It's evident right there in today’s Gospel reading, “Blessed are the pure in heart for they shall see God.”
All those who encountered Bev saw God in her eyes, they heard God in her words, they experienced God in her deeds.
As sure as I stand here today I know that very early on Wednesday morning when Beverly entered the nearer presence of God she was embraced, welcomed, greeted with the heavenly version of “Hi ya kid, job well done.”
Rest in peace dear Beverly, may all of us learn from you and go out from here remembering the happy times, the laughing times and the bright and sunny days.
Amen.
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